Video Follow-up

Pacione cross-posted his video on his Goth community at LJ, with different text.

I didn’t say I was a film maker this was my first attempt at doing home movies and all that good stuff.

And, it took him a month just to figure out how to transfer the clip off his camera onto his computer.

I was rushed in doing it because I didn’t have the speakers but I will have those inside od the month.

I fail to understand how not having speakers causes a four week delay in posting a video.  What that sentence does tell me, however, is that yet another writer will continue to go unpaid while he spends the money on himself.

. . . but one rule is this, no swiping of video but if you want to link the video from your own journal use the original post url where it comes from.

Good.  That’s precisely what I did in my previous entry, as well as this one.  It thrills me to no end to know that I have Mr. Pacione’s permission.  He’ll have a hard time trying to justify bitching at me for following his instructions.

First Video Blog

I see that Mr. Pacione finally got around to putting up a video blog. I wondered whether those audio clips that have been posted various places over the years were altered. Apparently not. If his voice changed during puberty, what did it sound like beforehand?

If you bastards go around stealing video from someone that is being dumb . . .

Is that somehow more inexcusable than stealing a video from someone who isn’t being dumb?

I had to listen several times to be sure, but Pacione really did say “high-tay-us” for hiatus, and “Coach Coolberson” instead of Coach Culbertson. Oh, my poor ears!

I will tar and feather the mother fucker who steals my video footage.

Since the only thing in the entire video that was close to being in focus was the Gothicfest sign in the background, it’s unlikely that anyone would steal it. It certainly wasn’t worth my effort to embed the code. I wonder whether this was taken before, or after, he lost his tripod.

Coach Culbertson and Pacione

Mike Duran posted a blog entry in which he interviewed someone named “Coach” Culbertson who puts out a literary magazine, Coach’s Midnight Diner. Here’s an excerpt in which Pacione’s name comes up in the context of Gothicfest 2007.

Decompose » INsites: Coach CulbertsonA well-known Christian suspense author called the Jesus Vs. Cthulhu concept “brilliant,” and a crazy small press horror editor, Nickolaus Pacione of Lake Fossil Press, has expressed massive delight at its intensity and authentic horror.

Crazy indeed.

The interview was accompanied by this lovely photo of Mr. Pacione himself, in his glorious White Sox cap. Nicky is giving his cheesiest grin while holding a copy of Coach’s magazine.

For the record, I have no idea who either Mike Duran or Coach Culbertson are. This merely showed up in my inbox as a Google alert.

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More Gothicfest

So, Zippy the Pinhead sold a whopping two copies of TPIV. This is from his latest on Blogspot.

I had managed to sell off all my Tabloid Purposes that I had at the event . . . I had just two copies of Tabloid Purposes IV there just as a test sort thing.

As always, the entry strays from one thought to another with little coherency.

The fact that some loser who stabbed me five times decided to get in contact with me via e-mail recently so I look at this with some

I don’t know where perspective comes into being stabbed, but it’s obvious that old stabbing wasn’t some random event if the person who did it knows Mr. Pacione.

It’s a little unclear, but I get the impression that Pacione thinks the person who stabbed him might be the one who runs Exposethetard. Of course, with all things Nicky, he’s not really sure.

Thinking it could really be the dick that stabbed me or some other jerk who went digging around my old website to see the information . . .

Pacione then proceeds to whine about someone he’s known since grade school.

The fact that my best friend of twenty plus years is involved now with the smear campaigns are going to be a nightmare waiting to happen. [. . .] The reason being he’s doing this is because I couldn’t get him into the venue I was signing at for free.

If Pacione has known this person that long, and the person really is his “best friend,” I shudder to think what his other “friends” are like. A real friend would have said something along the lines of “Oh well — thanks for trying.”

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Two Days of Darkness

Zippy has another entry up on Associated Content. The entry runs on for seven bloody pages, but does contain assorted goodies. He has a series of photos from Gothicfest 2007 linked to the page. The look on his face, standing next to Gashley Darcane, is priceless.

I didn’t really get a chance to do an interview but I was in no shape to be interviewed (exhausted from three days lack of sleep and losing my voice.) Doing book signings at events like this are always hit and miss. The only reason it was slow for the writers in general is that it was raining like mad on the second day. Even my signing mates didn’t really sell any books – they were cool people to hang out with and yeah I wouldn’t mind going on tour with them.

Does he realize that people go to things like that for the music, not for the vendors? Since he allegedly took over and didn’t allow his signing mates equal time, I’m sure they’d be reluctant to tour with him.

It was two days worth of darkness inside the event this year because it was one of those things that could been a twilight zone episode for me because there were a lot of things that happened on my part that let a lot of bad luck to my signing. My ex-room mate showed up and had to be everywhere that I needed to be and her friend stalked me the second part of the first night when I was trying to make a few sales and sabotaged those . . .

This confirms much of what Exposethetard reported, and jibes with what Nicky himself wrote in his last Blogspot entry.

The nice thing was that they did allow ins and outs this year so I was making food runs for the writers at my table.

Ha! Given his ever-expanding waistline, I think he made the food runs for himself, and offered to bring back stuff for the others while he was at it.

. . . gave a copy of The Storms of Armageddon and House of Spiders 3 to Belle Morte. It was cool to finally meet them and also met Don Henrie.

So he gave away books, instead of sold them, although one of the pictures claims someone actually bought a copy of Ethereal Gazette.

Yeah the weight gain was evident on my part but I didn’t really have the gut showing either, but then again that was because of the medication and being in the hospital for three weeks earlier in the year.

Most people lose weight in a hospital, but it can depend upon the medication. Still, the last time I’m aware he was in the hospital was right around the holidays at the end of 2006.

. . . time makes people better friends or in some cases with the one dressed as a fat Marie Antonette in the white dress on day two, bitter enemies. (That person was getting heckled the whole night from me and being given the middle finger. I was giving the “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?” look.)

Crazy Michelle was dressed like Marie Antoinette?

The thing that had set back the book signing was that I had a family emergency to take care of and the fact there is a malicious blog twisting the truth around (stealing copyrighted photos and artwork) – I will go on the record right now and say my grandfather had a stroke. That happened during the start of my book signing so I had to go later with it.

So wait. He said earlier that the rain and Crazy Michelle and her friend ruined it for him. This is a new twist. Obviously, it didn’t stop him doing his book signing. I wonder if Nicky found it as annoying as Grandpa Albert’s heart attack.

I lost my tripod at the event which sucked but other than that it was a fun weekend. My uncle came and got me then saw some interesting hot rods at the gas station when I stopped off and got something to eat.

I thought he was running in and out all the time getting food. Why he would need more on the way back escapes me. Maybe the tripod got buried under his spare tire.

The fact I did jump on the table this year I was testing the table out when I was setting up to see if it could support my weight. I was going to get a different table for next year that can support someone’s body weight the fact that Philbin and I are going to do 2008 will be a crazy deal.

Hoo boy. Philbin and Pacione together in the same room at the same table. I was indeed dying to know whether Zippy jumped up on the table. Sure enough . . .

. . . when he was spinning some intense industrial I did a loud “DESTROY” scream. It was a fucking riot. Some were saying, “You’re louder than the bands with the mic! You should front a metal act; got the throat for it.”

Wait. He said he lost his voice. Must have been after the scream.

The rest of the entry is devoted to people he met, and some free t-shirt he was given. He wore head to toe black to “make a statement.” Yes, because conformity always makes a statement.

* * * edited to add the comment he left on his own entry * * *

Nickolaus A. Pacione: Correction on the name — that would be Fitzgerald. I have some moments that are Dislexic at times, when I have the lack of sleep I get that way.

Zippy and Crazy Michelle

This afternoon’s Pacione activity has come fast and furious. First, Zippy the Pinhead posted this entry over at Chicago_Gothic at LJ, but deleted it pretty quickly and reposted it on his Blogspot.

The fact my cousin was ready to beat on him was another thing I want to mention here.

But Mr. Pacione was such a kind soul that he personally held back his cousin because he didn’t want to see Chris beat Mikey to a pulp.

My friends hated you from day one. That’s why they didn’t come over.

No. They didn’t come over because they’re non-existent. It’s impossible for the voices inside Mr. Pacione’s head to make a physical appearance.

The fact I will go on record that she has a mental illness and has no touch with reality.

I wouldn’t know about that, but I can say that’s an accurate self-assessment from Pacione. This entire entry reads as if he’s back off his meds.

She ruined my book signing on Saturday . . .

So, his book signing was the disaster I was expecting.

You want to come after me Michelle in the street, you will have
criminal charges on you and yes I will have a cop with me when that

This is some of the funniest stuff Pacione has ever written. He can’t even afford to pay minimum wage for an hour a day for “protection.” Maybe he should consider getting into stand-up comedy.

I have no voice right now so I can’t scream at you in person . . .

Alright, he did lose his voice. But, I doubt he has the cojones to scream at her in person, anyway. All the voice recordings I’ve heard of Mr. Pacione’s make him sound like a three year-old having a temper tantrum in a supermarket aisle.

You won’t be able to hide behind Brian Keene there.

WTF!?!? There’s about as much chance of that happening as there is of Pacione looking to me to provide him with protection.

This is a rightous anger Michelle, the kind of anger that comes when you steal money from the sick for their medicine.

Mr. Pacione wouldn’t have this problem if he didn’t blow his government check on cigarettes and camera equipment. Now that he’s been living rent-free in grammy’s basement for months, what’s his excuse? Right. Butts and camera equipment. Some things never change.

I wonder how it’ll go over with the judge when Crazy Michelle brings up the stolen computer equipment and whatever else he took with him when he moved out that wasn’t his.

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Excalibur & Gothicfest 2007

Does anyone have pictures of booth #9 from between 6:00 – 6:30 pm Central on Saturday?  I cannot resist asking.  The silence from the Pacione corner in the aftermath of the convention is deafening.

In the meantime, I’ll have to content myself with leaning back and listening to The Cure and The Clash.  If my musical taste sucks, so be it.  I may put on Chuck Mangione tomorrow.  I’ll listen to anything but rap.

I Couldn’t Resist

I know–I deserve 30 lashes with a wet noodle, but so be it. There’s a new parody blog entry here:

The parody Pacione story needs some editing before I post it over on Unfortunately, it’s still too coherent.

It takes far more talent than I have to write well enough to sell a story (and there’s no market for what I enjoy writing, anyway), so I know better than to try, but short parodies are just plain old fun to write. The hitch is that it’s awfully difficult to follow the rules of thumb for a Pacione parody:

  • leave in typos caused by typing too quickly
  • leave in word or phrase elisions caused by editing in mid-sentence
  • leave in extraneous words caused by the aforementioned
  • mix up spellings of homonyms
  • screw up punctuation
  • be redundant
  • use circumlocution
  • use little or no plot
  • get stuck in a rut that demands the use of dreams, nightmares, and darkness
  • use extremely convoluted sentence structure (or none whatsoever)
  • pretend to be erudite
  • drift off into no conclusion

I figure that if any eight of the aforementioned elements are present, it should be entertaining for a few minutes. That is, after all, my only goal in throwing together these parody shorts.


Mr. Pacione has been spending the past couple of weeks posting comments in various groups at MySpace:  Gothicfest, DemonsandDarlings, and Traditional Horror.  He must be really stoked about Gothicfest.

If anyone who reads this blog happens to attend tomorrow, please take pictures of him and his booth, and post them online for his “fans” to view.  I, for one, would be grateful.  The one of him standing on the table at his 2005 booth, screeching “RIDE THE STORM!” was classic.