Lake Fossil Press Babe

It’s been nearly two months since Mr. Pacione announced he was recruiting a model to promote Lake Fossil Press part time. I wonder whether he’s gotten any applications.

The basic requirements (scroll about halfway down the page in the above link) are bizarre. He wants a fat or skinny chick who looks good in jeans and hightops, like a cross between a goth and a metalhead, and can look scary. I understand the scary part; if the other criteria were satisfied, scary would be the automatic result. The desired dress code is completely un-goth, further proving that Pacione is, at best, a hanger-on, and not part of the goth scene at all.

This is my favorite line:

Just be able to look scary too —┬ábecause . . . I am on a fixed income.

Unless he meant “scared,” one doesn’t follow from the other.

I would venture a guess that not one “model” has sent an application. We would have heard more about it if Pacione had received inquiries.

It seems to be a harebrained scheme he picked up from the local scene. Never one to have an original idea, Pacione decided he must have a goth chick of his own to promote his press.

The Horror publishers in the area recruit goth chicks with the titles they publish.

I’d be very curious to know the status.

19 thoughts on “Lake Fossil Press Babe

  1. All he needs to do to get himself a goth chick is to first take a bath in bleach. then he needs to use formaldihye on his hair and then maybe a dip in sulphuric acid.

    Otherwise he’ll never get the stench out. One whiff of his stench and he’s a loser with the women.

  2. We have his address. Shall we mail soap, shampoo, deodorant, and some scissors to cut that nasty hair off to his residence with a note attached that says “TAKE THE HINT”?

    Also, does Nick know that almost no one he’s looking for is into the jeans and hi-tops anymore? I haven’t seen too many chicks sporting that look since the early nineties.

  3. I like goth chicks and they don’t tend to wear jeans or much of what he wanted. also, he isn’t attractive or wealthy. no one will want him.

  4. Regardless of where he got the idea, if he couldn’t pay rent and a share of utilities, and he still owes a bunch of authors money, I don’t see how he could pay a promoter. It seems that every time he gets a few bucks in hand, he blows it on his own books, a sales booth, or camera equipment.

  5. Heh. And I just found pictures of a potential model for Nicky. The only things are, she’s a little older than what he would like, and she really doesn’t convey “scary” in any of her pictures.

    Oh, and she clearly doesn’t look goth. But she does meet the “jeans and hi-tops” look that he made sure to emphasize.

    So, here she is (fair warning: some pics are NSFW!). I wonder how long it’ll take before Nicky copies some of these images and starts turning them into advertisements for his imaginary publishing company…

  6. To: Eye of the Hurricane (in comment box 9)

    No, I’m not in touch with Pacione since I:

    a) verified the incident involving him threatening a certain author’s child.

    b) the Kody Boye incident and learning about 14 year olds on Tabloid Purposes.

    c) I played coy and used Nickolaus for some of that email correspondence now available on Mr. Barnes xanga. Info about his hate towards the school teacher and other premeditated threats.

    A, B, and C took place around August 1st if my memory serves me right. And that’s it. If you don’t want to believe that, then I can’t help that.

    Mike Philbin, I message or chat with on the forum on the off and on… We share the same publisher after all.

  7. Ben,

    Not only did that “model” fit the jeans and hi-tops dress code, but she was scary as well. If I saw her I’d run the other way. Redneck milfs are scary, however the suck a mean dick though.

  8. Lawrence, you’ve been friends with the two most contemptuous individuals in the genre. People notice and remember things like that. It doesn’t matter if you suddenly “saw the light” in regards to Pacione (which is a ridiculous and transparent claim, by the way). From where many of us sit, you’re just as bad as the two of them.

  9. Ms. Frank, the whole thing is a publicity stunt. When I have time, I promise I will email you. It’s been hectic on my end. So please forgive me.

    But this is a big publicity stunt by Philbin (who gets everything from filmmaker Takashi Miike) and Pacione to sell their new books or memoirs, try and brainwash people who buy higher end genre fiction novels(or mass market horror authors). Turn people’s thinking around where they won’t buy books by the current pros.

    They want to start a revolution. Will it work? The Philbin plan is interesting — Agent Orange says no more — methodical. But when torn apart and analyzed, in my humble opinion, it’s just a bunch of people airing dirty Internet laundry. It’s drama. Drama which is like crack-cocaine to us. Hey, who would have thought I would be posting on Rusty Nail, so I confess I’ve become one of the addicted.

    And for the record, I met Nick a year before LB like every other unsuspecting writer. I found him on Ralan. I submitted a few pieces to Tabloid Purposes 3 (didn’t know of this Pacione stuff back then), when he was reading for it, and I was excited to learn I’d appear with Mr. Goldman and Mrs. Burgess. Then I saw he had ANOTHER anthology, Class of 1994. I wrote him and said I’d like to be a part of this, that I graduated high school a year late, but I’m still class of 94.

    I never googled him until I was well into the helm of LB, and I thought he was just mental with a big mouth. I kind of thought of him as “Jimmy the Greek”. Remember him?

    That’s how I met Pacione. Honest.

  10. I did see a young lady in jeans and high tops yesterday, and thought of you all! Young, very pretty, and…are you ready? READING A BOOK! I was quite smitten.

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