Nicky’s on Patch

Although I’m not sure when our favorite sleeping midget joined Patch, I received an alert in my inbox today.  Note that aside from the profile, both posts he made are only a day old.  Here’s the link to his profile page.

Perhaps Patch doesn’t allow users to insert links into posts.  Nothing he mentions is linked within his entries.  Patch is basically a network of local news bulletin boards, as far as I can tell, sort of like Nextdoor, but more newsy than members asking for local contractor recommendations, posting about local festivals, or warning neighbors about a rash of car break-ins in whatever neighborhood.

From his profile, he evidently still considers himself a small press publisher who has a boss and co-workers.  LOL.

For those of us still theoretically in lockdown, with arbitrary rules about which businesses are allowed to remain open, under what circumstances, stay safe, and stay sane.

On a closing note, for a bit of levity, my brother-in-law decided to serve rabbit for Easter dinner.  I kind of wish we’d thought of that.  We just fixed a spiral cut ham, with a few side dishes.  Boring, but traditional.  Lots of leftover ham, of course, but there are so many ways to use it.  When we finally get down to the bone, with just some scraps worth of musculature left on it, we’ll make a nice big batch of split pea soup.

Li’L Nikita Strikes Again

Hat tip:  Naaman Brown

I’m more than a little late to the plate on this one.  Evidently, Nicky’s tried to steal someone’s anthology, and make it look like it’s his.  From what I can tell:

  • He had a story accepted
  • He volunteered to do the cover, and some editing
  • He padded it out with at least one story from a woman who had no clue he’d swiped her story
  • He posted the book listing on BookPatch as though it was his, writing the blurb and only comment himself
  • Posted an ad on his old high school’s Facebook page about the book

Mr. Brown tells me:

I am beginning to think the boy has taken over someone else’s book, like he did with Jordan Bobe’s “Darkened Horizons 3”, Carter Kaplan’s “Emanations”, Serena Carrington’s “Avalon”, Aimee Bejarano’s “The Gateway”, Butler’s “The Aeneid”, Bloch’s “This Crowded Earth”, either by being involved [by having one story in the book, or] as a book designer or deciding it’s P.D. and his for the taking. I might be wrong, but, hey, it’s Nickolaus Pacione.

I think he’s right.  The sad part is that the woman whose story he stole is flattered.  He never even contacted her about using it under creative commons, so she found out about it some other way.

On two completely different subjects, Ozzie, our newest adoptee 10 y/o cat, has settled in so well with the other cats, and the dog, that none of them challenge or spook him anymore, and the oddball items I can find on eBay for super cheap never fail to astonish me.

Ozzie has turned out to be a real lap cat, which is great in winter.  He’s a long and tall longhair, so when he sprawls across my lap, he’s the feline equivalent of a fur draft chaser.  He’s got a few physical oral and sinus issues, but nothing other than that.

As for eBay, it’s so easy to find all sorts of things, from tractor parts to party supplies.  From time to time, we do need replacement parts for our tractors; usually, Craig’s List is better, but eBay sometimes has what we need.  Throwing a party for some neighbors and friends is something I have to do, because we got invited to their parties over the holidays.  Sure, we brought hostess gifts, but still, I owe them.  Throwing an outdoors BBQ/cookout is the way to go.  Informal, pool will be open for swimming by then, kids are welcome, the food will be good, and none of it will be catered.  Kids may not like satay sauce, or a spicy BBQ sauce, but they will be fine with Sweet & Sour sauce, or a sweet BBQ sauce.

Have an outdoors bar, with beer, wine, and non-alcoholic beverages.  Set up the tables for seating, and a buffet style setting.  I’ll do the cooking, and the guests may serve themselves.  I’m willing to bet our guests, kids included, would love root beer floats for dessert.  Plenty of coolers and ice will serve to keep the food that should be kept cold, cold; chafing dishes will be fine for anything that should be kept warm, such as pulled pork, flank steak, etc.




Hat Tip:  AliceWest

I’d call it road rage, but Nicky can’t legally be issued a driver’s license.

JEEZUS … give it a break, Nikita, and let Kody live out the rest of his life without you.


Peaches Porcine and the Fake Accounts

Hat tips:  Lewis, Just Me

In addition to setting up fake accounts at Reddit and Writerscafe in the names of people with whom Nikita has a beef, he set up one at some place called Blurb, to go after some guy he thinks is one of those evil King James Bible only people.

Here’s the screenshot, in case it goes bye-bye:

Notice how it’s all about him and his legendary, in his own mind, books?  That’s so typical of Peaches.

Peaches Pacione Is Back (Updated)

Hat tip:  Lewis

Evidently, the porcine one is back in his full glory:

Nikita got the boot from the last one:

20:51, April 28, 2018 Boioflife (wall | contribs) blocked Nickolaus Pacione (wall | contribs) with an expiry time of 6 months (cannot edit own talk page) (Inserting information about himself and links to his books to buy after being told not to do this.)

From allthetropes:

I have a pitch for a project to have the fandoms who are connected to Joni over the years as a shout out to her career in the New Weird; Greer if you’re reading this you also got to see some of her colleagues and friends within the New Weird Circles. These are colleagues from so I want to invite all of you to do a book called Nunkie Social Studies: Learning Real Social Studies from a historic fandom. I will give you the skeleton as The Cabbie Homicide would be one of those stories that would fit the mode of the timeline of the fandom (plays up in 1993-1994, and Lake Fossil is set in 1993. Some of my material will overlap.) I suggest finding Susan Wickham or my artist who did Tales of the Talisman 2.4 then have one of your OC’s play host for such a project — edit the book in character and have a lot of fun with this.
So this is what I’m proposing — have you used Submittable. And what I am suggesting is each member of the fandom; they have 2200-6700 word counts to play with and a 190-198 page count with the body of the work. Instead of a book that lifts Twilight; take the reader into the real social studies of the fandom. I give you An Eye In Shadows as a link to play with and find artwork that’s in creative commons to play with or have the fan art from the fandom to create something layout wise similar to Issue Five in nature but using a different typewriter font with the presentation. I don’t have room for any more books personally but I can give you the website to do this.

Pfft.  *barf*

If you have some time to delve into the madness, it’s a loop-de-loop through the classic Nicky days of old, with a couple of extra loops.

“Abandon all hope, ye who enter.”

UPDATE:  (another H/T to Lewis)  Evidently, Nikita thinks the people removing his edits on the fiftyshadesofgrey wiki are holocaust deniers.

Screenshot for posterity, in case it gets deleted:

Love Letters from Nicky

Apparently, these were sent a week ago, but I never noticed until today, when I went in to clean out my inbox.  Both are replies to a really ancient post here on TRN.  Read ’em, and LOL.

This one came in on the 12th at 6:11 pm:

Author: Nickolaus Pacione (IP address: [redacted])
I didn’t event shit.  I revealed something about you that you failed to omit.  The Rusty Nail’s sources were a bunch of pseudo-academia fabulists who fabricated every source about me.  Fan History got the history right about me as I invaded Barker’s website in 2000. The slash fandom sees me as a threat because of The Fandom Writer as The House of Pain E-Zine picked this because she knew my hatred for Melissa Brite went back to turning 20.  Look you Taig, you realize you encountered someone who got your goat because they told the truth at your expense. The Rusty Nail’s lackeys aka some of your noted fanbase was caught red handed plagiarizing some of my better known creative nonfiction outings like a little faggot.  I didn’t get noticed for writing about talking dogs, you did.  I got noticed because I got into it with trolls as I was never a fucking troll as you claim.  You whitewashed the history in the independent press as you didn’t realize what I did when The Cabbie Homicide emerged.

I “got noticed” for writing about talking dogs?  That’s news to me.  His ad hominem attack is to be expected; unfortunately, he missed on both my ethnic heritage and religion.  I agree he didn’t “event” shit.”  He didn’t invent it, either, but he’s awfully familiar with pounding away on a keyboard to produce it.

This one was sent nine minutes later, at 6:20 pm:

Author: Nickolaus Pacione (IP address: [redacted])
“FBI file” sounds like you fabricated that source like you drew from many of your sources about me.  If one shits on The Cabbie Homicide, they missed the point of why I wrote it.  I was the same age as it came from a frightening taxicab confession as I found the article about the case as it unfolded between 1993-1994.  I introduced something quite real as I am criminally underestimated — Melissa Brite’s big mistake in 2003.  I was already a cult writer by the time I wrote Cabbie as my would be publisher in 2005 discovered this piece as it appeared on Instead of urinating on my name verbally on a regular fucking basis you should see what I accomplished by introducing H. P. Lovecraft into a public school.  I held my own with him as Ramsey Campbell did as I also held my own with Kevin Lucia (by the way you’re welcome for me finding him.)  Instead of acting like a little bitch when someone told the truth about you and your tenor on The House of Pain — I discovered your “schmuck bait” button.  Mention The Clause in the same sentence as The Cabbie Homicide;  as you got freight-trained the second time when I showed you “You’re In” with a creative nonfiction piece no one saw before.  You’re dealing with someone who found Stephen Glass’ fabricated bullshit on a whim.

At least he didn’t misspell his story title this time.  Remember the one version he published with the title “The Cabbie Homocide”?  WTF is he talking about with a “schmuck bait” button on House of Pain?  For that matter, wtf is “You’re In”?

I used to be better at interpreting his word salad.  I must getting a bit, um, rusty.  Oh, well, it’s been a while.