Nicky’s “gauntlent” entry is unintentionally hilarious.
I am presenting the gauntlet with this submission call and offering $30 for editor’s choice. Since the assholes at Skullvines Press keeps insulting me by calling me a fan fiction writer in the Edgar Allan Poe and H.P. Lovecraft fandom (I just have a style that just echoes those influences.)
At least he got the spelling of gauntlet correct within the body of his post.
So I am looking for horrors of hardship and poverty. I am a struggling author and publisher, I pay authors out of my own pocket with my disability check. I started Lake Fossil Press to keep me sane.
Taking his meds might work a little better, because LFP isn’t doing the trick for him.
I started Broken Mindframe Books in 2007 to house my memoir.
That’s his eyeshadow book about how people have been picking on him since he was in middle school, and that’s why he’s such an asshole. Exposethetard posted a few hilarious cartoon videos of excerpts from that one.
I mixed it up with Quakes And Storms by including nonfiction submissions in the anthology. This is the trait that made my company unique to the small press for a long time,
That was the book he edited that got him in legal trouble for stealing a National Geographic cover. I’ll give him credit for that making his company unique.
He considers himself a professional victim, among other things, but really, he’s only a professional grade-A jerk.
The comments are even better than the entry.
THOUGHTS ON “PRESENTING A GAUNTLENT”
May as well offer 300, seeing as you never pay anyone anyway.
Look jackhole, I paid Ray Faraday Nelson $30.00 for his story. I used to offer bonuses to writers who were also part of Tabloid Purposes. A Tabloid Purposes alumni would been looking at $25.00 for their story early on. I was a paying market from the very beginning. I offered payment to some of the writers of the first Tabloid Purposes, they actually refused payment. I am having the allumni help me look for the author that would be editor’s choice then I would invite the editor’s choice author to do a guest blog on here. I published three 4theluv anthologies so far. The first one like this was one I did just for shits and giggles because I had downtime between Tabloid Purposes 3 and the next issue of The Gazette. Two of my Issue 3 contributors decided to join me on More Frightening Than Fiction, a fan from Don Henrie’s message board who read some of my freebies submitted and a contributor who wrote a nonfiction story for Quakes And Storms: A Natural Disaster Anthology rejoined the fray plus a member from a group I was active with. I was just accepted for Withersin but didn’t hear back for a street date so I thought I would include the rough draft of the story that was accepted for them.
I am doing this as editor’s choice like Coach Culbertson did when he edited Coach’s Midnight Diner and Relief Journal, The Ethereal Gazette: Issue 10 was peers with Relief Journal and Withersin. Coach’s Midnight Diner: Jesus Vs. Cthulhu Edition was Tabloid Purposes IV’s contemporary. I bought the anthology when it first came out then e-mailed Coach saying, “I have to take you with me as my signing mate for Gothicfest 2007. Here’s a copy of Tabloid Purposes 3 to read, I am just trying to finish Tabloid Purposes IV. I am looking for an anthology that balances out Tabloid Purposes IV’s dark nature.” Coach agreed to join me and he hand delivered my print copy of the Diner — I devoured this book in one day and renewed my faith in God that night. Some of the writers in the Diner wouldn’t be out of place in a Tabloid Purposes. I almost worked with the breakout star from that anthology on a project that was going to be distributed to schools but the computer crashed and I was working on the anthology that eventually reworked making the project more personal got in the Poe Museum. That anthology was something I planned as something I could give away at shows I did as a promoter. The first namesake came from the leftover submissions I had from Tabloid Purposes IV when I issued out a contest on WritersCafe.org. I was thinking of an idea for a story I got published in the UK of where to give it a home in the United States. The story got me a following in the Goth scene in the UK it was a Goth Zine that was put out in the underground there, the editor of that magazine had another magazine that published me and Eric S. Brown in the same issue. My story was originally for an urban legend contest. The story my ex-girlfriend wrote featured in Issue 4 was her entry for the contest. I gave a story I wrote called The Temp a home in Issue 4. Issue 5 saw a story that was simil-released to Dark Gothic Resurrected. When she published and I published it — we were planning to release the issues at the same time. I sent this story to the cover model on Insomnia Magazine as a first look, it was a story that I wrote when I thought I lost a story I previously wrote on the computer in the back bedroom of my Justice, Illinois, apartment. One of the authors on the second namesake immortalized my old address after she read Apt. #2W.
At a professional rate of five cents per word, the most you’d get out of me would be 600 words. However, since you have repeatedly shown substandard skills with spelling and grammar — let alone, character, action, plot, settling and tone — and you don’t use contracts, I would never submit a piece of work to you. You’re simply not a professional.
“I am even challenging my most famous critic Ramsey Campbell to try to write a horror take on creative nonfiction. I don’t think he can capture his horror in a true story.”
Mr Pacione, please at least do your homework and read my non-fiction. It refutes your comment.
” I sent one of my unpublished Creative nonfiction stories to Joe via e-mail and in a message on facebook he blurbed me saying I know how to capture the reader.”
Which Joe was this, Joe the Binman? And do you capture them with a candy bar placed under a box propped up with a stick to which you’ve tied some string?
Ramsey Campbell has already written the most horrific non-fiction you’ll ever see. The fact that you don’t know this just shows your lack of research and knowledge of the genre you claim to be a master of..
And what the hell does “Presenting A Gauntlent” mean? I presume it’s a typo?
If there’s a typo in the heading of your submission call, how the hell do you expect to be taken seriously?
And you should really learn the difference between the words namesake and pseudonym.
I’ll have to decline this challenge because:
A.) None of it even makes SENSE, and
B.) Got an anthology project of my own to focus on.
But, to the “alumni,” good luck, best wishes and godspeed. It’s never too late.