Courtesy of Stinky Cat
You know, I do have a rather large, ~12 lb. chunk of shiny anthracite I picked up near some railroad tracks. I wonder how much it would cost to ship that thing to Nicky.
That reminds me to be on the lookout for that root beer flavored candy coal. It makes a great stocking stuffer.
Brilliant as ever, Stinky!
I’ll have to look for root beer coal candy too.
I imagine Santa Nicky would come down the chimney, get stuck, get sick from the smoke, make it down, eat milk and cookies and everything in fridge, stuff himself into his sack then sleep on the couch and never leave.
A quick duck-duck-go search brings up several options for the licorice, cinnamon, and mint flavored versions of candy coal, but I’d really like to find the root beer ones. Licorice is a second choice; dad and I both love it, but mom doesn’t. When it comes to the cinnamon or peppermint flavored ones, I can make those myself. Finding anise extract or root beer syrup is not so easy. Making candy is kind of fun, but I’d just as soon stick to making peppermint bark, peanut brittle, and English toffee this year, none of which requires messing with food color.
‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through Morris
Not a creature was stirring, not even Billy Porris.
The sleepsack was flung on the sofa with care
In hopes that that Rick’s mamma soon would be there.
Ricky’s carebears were all snug in their beds
But poor old Ricky was still off his meds.
Ricky and Lloyd in their smelly sleepsack
Had just settled down for a long winter’s nap
When on the computer arose such a clatter
Rick sprang from the sleepsack to see what was the matter.
He opened the laptop with such a flash
That he just about tripped and fell on his ass.
‘Twas just an email from a “plagiarist”
Ordering Ricky to “cease and desist!”
‘Twas nothing new for Ricky the Troll,
Who liked to creep and harass one and all,
But it inspired him to spend all night online
Threatening and bullying anyone he could find.
While Santa worked ‘til morn to spread Christmas cheer
Old Ricky tweeted and emailed Un-Christmas-like jeers.
Clever!
Holidays make me nostalgic. I remember my childhood winters. Our home was heated by a Warm Morning brand coal stove. My assigned chores included going to the coal bin in the back of our garage to fetch buckets of coal then taking the cinders that had fallen through the grate out and spreading them on our unpaved drive that ran from the street to the garage. I imagine a lump of coal would generate more heat and more solid ash than a copy of “An Eye in Shadows” and would be a much better present. (Though as a child I personally favored the electric trainset granma and grandpa gave to me and my brother.) Merry Christmas to all and happy memories.
Hmmm…I wonder if there are still a few chunks of coal in my grandma’s basement in the room where my cousin tells his kids she used to lock him up in. (he’s joking before anyone throws a fit) 😀
I’ve been on a Nut People craft kick this week … kind of hideously tempted to make some based on these comics 😀
That would be funny!
If you do, I want pictures!